The Sober One
It's hard, ya know? To quit drinking. My sister-in-law quit drinking for a month for the health benefit and to give herself a break. Seeing how well she was doing I told myself, "I could do that." So I assessed my calendar, found a month with no [scheduled] evening or weekend activity and set out to do it.
I lasted one week. And a half.
Ya know, I didn't even miss the alcohol, buzz, or taste. Ok, kinda the taste — amber ale beers are so good. But I didn't feel addicted like I needed it to unwind or take control of my nights. Though I did notice just how much drinking is present on social media.
No, the real reason I started drinking again is simple — so many people asked if I was pregnant that I started to believe it for myself. I even came home from work and asked Kip, "Someone asked me again today if I was pregnant... I'm not right? Like there's no way I could be."
Wowzas, it's hard to say no to alcohol when everyone expects you to say yes! The peer pressure without even meaning to give it, is real. It made me reassess how I react to people when they say they aren't drinking for the night. "Whaaaaat? C'mon, not even one?" I say it with shock as if it's such a crime. And as innocent as I mean it, I now know just how ill-intentioned it can feel on the receiving end.
We recently read What Alice Forgot in book club and a major section of the book is dedicated to the storyline of a woman who's suffering from infertility. Everything people did or said hurt her without even meaning to. And it made me realize I should lay off a little.
I've gone on the hunt before to investigate if someone was pregnant — almost asking directly if they were. But what would that have accomplished for me? Would I really feel better if I found out before they wanted me to know? Maybe I'd feel better knowing before their husband. Or God forbid they're trying but having difficulties and I just brought it to the surface. I've definitely wanted to prove my intuition right – but it's not worth it.
This needs a disclaimer: I'm not at all upset with people for asking me! No hard feelings, no pregnancy recognized or infertility found. But I had to share how it made me rethink my actions.
And in case you're about to creep my Facebook, nah, I'm still not pregnant. Nor are we even trying. But you'll be the third to know after my husband... and Haleigh who I promised would be second. 😂 And yes I'm still drinking — because who can stay way from those perfectly balanced sweet and hoppy amber ales?